I Can See Clearly Now

This is my second story for this week’s What Pegman Saw, https://whatpegmansaw.com/2017/10/14/mauritius/.  It was prompted by the picture below (which I didn’t find myself, but lifted from the excellent story by Pegman co-host Karen).  Thank you Karen.

To see other people’s stories and add your own, please click on the link:

I can see clearly now

Bert and Ken gelled from the start of this touring holiday for singles. Gazing up at the mighty cascade Bert was intrigued by his new friend’s enigmatic expression.
“Penny for ’em,” Bert said.
“It reminds me of my Lois, my first wife.”
“She liked waterfalls?”
“Hated ‘em, wet and noisy, she said, like the dripping tap I never fixed. When we went to Jamaica; she didn’t even want to visit Dunn’s River Falls … too many tourists. So we went at night.”
“You think we should get back to the coach?”
“Woman was like a sodding waterfall, though. For 25 years she subjected me to a torrent of insults. Poured cold water on every idea I had.”
“I’m sorry, Ken, I shouldn’t have pried. I see why the waterfall reminds you of Lois.”
“No you don’t, Bert. I didn’t tell you how she died, did I?”

146 words


I posted two stories because they popped into my head almost simultaneously. One started off cutesy and light, the other (this one) was meant to be a bit darker. On the screen, they both ended up somewhere in the middle. After I’d posted the first story, I couldn’t bring myself to scrap this one. It features a married couple about whom I’ve written before and I thought they had unfinished business.

This entry was posted in Domestic Dysfunctionalism, Flash Fiction, Tourism. Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to I Can See Clearly Now

  1. prior.. says:

    ha! the ending line got me…
    and love this part the most:
    cold water on every idea

    I call those folks joy robbers

    Liked by 1 person

  2. prior.. says:

    I also like how you noted your process of sharing both stories for the prompt. not only does it help us to get to know the author here – with your fun passion for valuing the two takes…. but I think it models something for other writers – esp. fiction newbies like myself – so thanks

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Dear JS,

    I think I’ve pretty good inkling of how Lois died. Sounds like a bit of a wet falling out. 😉 good one.



    Liked by 1 person

  4. pennygadd51 says:

    Oh dear! Drowned or fell? Neither sounds nice – Brrrr….

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Oh! Be careful who you tell, Ken! Good story with a great end, except perhaps for Lois.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Dahlia says:

    No wonder waterfalls evoke such emotions in him! Very nicely done

    Liked by 1 person

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